The Way of Happiness

The Way of Happiness

There are key happiness tactics and strategies that have shown to increase happiness. To be happy requires skills. 

Happiness Is Not Supposed to Be Elusive

Happiness is not supposed to be an abstract ideal. Instead, it should be readily available wherever you go. 

7 Principles of Happiness

  • Focus on fulfillment
  • Dedicate more time to your values
  • Set a personal happiness level
  • Drive from happiness
  • Avoid the “if-then” trap
  • Increase frustration tolerance
  • Concentrate on purpose

Core Concepts

There are three primary concepts that are important in your happiness journey:

  • Happiness is personal.
  • Happiness is not static; it is a verb.
  • There are two happiness questions: “How happy are you with your life?” and “how happy are you?”

Bonus Tactics

Strategies are effective but you need practical tactics for things to work out:

  • Keep your eyes on the greater good.
  • Act “as if”.
  • Cultivate happiness under you.
  • Find your best happiness quotes.
  • Look for a better metaphor (e.g. life is a dance).
  • Adjust your questions for different results.
  • Adjust your thoughts.

Take a closer look at the principles.

Focus on Fulfillment

When you focus on living life meaningfully, you will be more careful while making choices and creating moments. To do this, you must decide who you want to be and the kind of experiences you would like to create. If you want to focus on fulfilment, set your eyes on the greater good.

Dedicate More Time to Your Values

Living out your values helps you add happiness into your daily life. For people that spend the better part of their day working, try linking your job to your values. If excellence is important to you, make the work all about excellence. When more time is dedicated to your values, the journey becomes more enjoyable.

Set a Personal Happiness Level

Everyone has a personal happiness level. Embrace your level and begin from there. Look for simple ways through which you can improve your happiness level gradually. Avoid comparing your happiness levels to that of others.

Drive from Happiness

Happiness must be a decision. 

Here, you must look deep within you and answer some very tough questions. What would you like to make more time for? What is it that makes you happy? What do you want to do? Instead of doing what everyone else expects of you, look for what makes you happy.

Avoid the “If-Then” Trap

Your happiness should not depend on an event that you expect to happen in the future, such as a relationship, job, etc. have your happiness “right here” rather than “out there”. Have fun with the journey. Work with what you have.

Increase Your Frustration Tolerance

A higher frustration tolerance can translate to a higher happiness level. This insight works instantly. You just need to decide not to be frustrated with the little disappointments of life.

Concentrate on Purpose

What you focus on is what you get. Start focusing on better scenes and see what happens. Human beings set goals and do everything within their power to chase after them. They either attain the goals or drop dead. Once one goal has been achieved, they set another one and it goes on and on.

This is how people are wired. America is in a time of abundance—much more like never in human history. Basic needs are generally met for everyone and, therefore, you think the only goals left to set are money goals. You aspire to earn a certain amount of income, build investments, and savings to a certain level and create a passive income stream. You set these goals so you can live the lifestyle of your choice and spend some time with your loved ones.

You also want to be financially independent. To put it simply, you are trying to be happy and according to you, more money means happiness. Now, suppose you have all the money you desire in your bank account. You have finally achieved financial independence. You have enough time to spend with the ones you love, and you can go wherever you want—money is unlimited. Will you be happy? Sure, initially.

However, once the ecstatic stage of travel, binge purchases and whatever else is over, you will be bored to death. You may find yourself lonely and depressed—something common to many famous and rich people. Why the unhappiness? Everyone wants to succeed, but success feels better when it is earned instead of undeservedly handed out.

To be truly happy, you need to pursue and attain your lifestyle goals. This is common sense but how true is it? Some people pursue their goals, become successful but they are still unhappy. What is missing? You have a need to overcome your obstacles, accomplish, and achieve your goal. For human beings, the pursuit is the end, not the means to an end. Without it, you will be rich yet miserable, well-traveled yet depressed, financially independent yet bored.

The lifestyle you seek reflects the connection you yearn for. For example, experiences are only full when shared with loved ones. To be happy, you need to integrate and balance your drive for pursuit and connection. Your love for the chase should be anchored to the reason for the chase. However, is that all there is to it? If you are successful in what you do and have healthy connections, will there be anything eating you up?

Yes. There is one more piece to the puzzle. Once your basic needs (pursuit) and psychological needs (connection) have been fulfilled, the missing piece is self-actualization. To achieve total happiness, you must achieve your full potential and use your talents to the maximum. Calogero from a scene in A Bronx Tale says that: “the saddest thing in life is wasted talent, and the choices that you make will shape your life forever.” 

“The majority of men meet with failure of their lack of persistence in creating new plans to take the place of those which fail.” 

-Napoleon Hill

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